Kudos

Yesterday I received not one, but two really nice notes from other therapists I've worked with recently. Sometimes it's really easy for me to disregard the kudos I receive, instead choosing to stay focused on my "problem areas" or weak spots. So I'm just going to take a minute here to soak in these kind words, at the risk of bragging a little bit in the process.

The first is from a therapist that I met in massage therapy school. She and I used to do a weekly trade of bodywork, but she went out of state for a few months at the end of last year. We just reinstated our weekly trade as of this past Monday.

Yesterday morning I went out the front door of my apartment to discover this lovely note from her, written in a beautiful little embossed card, wedged into the door jamb. She must have dropped it by late the night before, or early that morning.

It finally came "full circle" for me yesterday. After receiving such fabulous, yet relieving work from you-- I felt I provided the same for my client/friend that evening and it was such a sense of finally crossing that Bridge of Knowing*!*

The thing is, I know exactly what she's talking about. Receiving bodywork on a regular basis is a really important part of my learning process as well. Getting onto the table as a client reminds me of just how good any massage therapy feels, and receiving neuromuscular therapy in particular, I am reminded of how simple yet effective this kind of therapy really is for the body and mind. Being reminded of that on a regular basis, I have found, really boosts my confidence. It serves as a reminder to "just do the work" and to trust that it will be powerful and effective.

I tend to be an overly analytical person, so I can fall into the trap of overthinking what I am doing. I can get in the way of the work itself if I'm not careful to just stay present, trust my instincts and keep it simple. I'm really gratified that I could be that catalyst for another therapist's remembering. But more than that, I'm just so grateful for this particular friend and her willingness to share her feedback with me. She sets a really good example and serves as a reminder to me never to hold back on praise. I'm so pleased we'll be trading every week once again!

The second note came in the form of an email, from a therapist I've been studying with for the past nine months or so. She runs a non-profit organization that brings massage therapy to people in or with a history of cancer treatment. She has quickly become one of my heroes. She is professional, knowledgeable, and incredibly technically skilled as a therapist. At the same time, she is loving, open, generous of spirit, and incredibly kind-hearted. She is also a wonderful example to me of self-care and setting boundaries. I just all-around admire her deeply.

Technically, I finished my oncology massage practicum in December of last year. But I loved the experience of working with the chemo patients within the infusion center setting, so I let the founder know that I'd be interested in staying involved, and ultimately, finding a regular weekly volunteer placement. She offered me the opportunity to go into an IC for a 2-hour session on Tuesday by myself, followed by a debriefing with her. I was nervous but I wanted to have the experience of going in alone. I figured I had to have my first solo run sooner or later, so I might as well go for it.

This is what she had to say the following day:

Lovely seeing you onsite yesterday!

You have a lovely grace, and a special skill at bringing harmony into a space,
and no doubt those who receive your touch benefit tremendously from that.

[...]

It may take some searching to find exactly what you want,
but have no doubt, you will find it.

It may seem like a small thing, but I really appreciated those words of encouragement. This particular profession can feel a bit lonely and isolated at times. There is no corporate "parent" whose apron I can hide beneath anymore. There is no entity or individual who will be there to lend legitimacy to what I do, or to validate the quality or efficacy of my work. For the first time in my professional life, I will really have to learn the art of marketing my skills and my self. It can feel quite daunting at times, but notes like this one really help a lot. Again, I find myself just feeling grateful for this individual, the work that she does, and her willingness to be so inclusive, encouraging, and generous with her time and energy. I learn a lot by observing experienced, successful therapists-- how they present themselves, and how they interact with others. I can't think about my own success too hard without feeling quickly overwhelmed with the anxiety of potential failure. So instead, I just go into each day as open as I possibly can be, putting one foot in front of the other and trusting the work itself. If I take my "self" out of the equation as much as possible, and make it about the work, I find my anxiety quickly begins to subside.